A blog post for April Fool’s Day.

Disease. Old age. Death.

Social scientists at the University of Siddharth have identified three problems in modern life which they say are already causing severe strains and may erode public confidence if not addressed soon.

The project lead, Rakhesh Chowdury, explained that in an aging society, death, in particular, is likely to bring into question the reliability of life.

When asked what steps he recommended, he said he was encouraged by some recent grassroots initiatives, particularly the #NotMyReality movement.

On Wednesday we contacted a spokesman for the movement, who said that plans were under way for massive marches on all the capitals of the world. Pointing to recent developments in the US, he said that the Not My President movement was good, but predicted that it would be inadequate to address the full extent of the crisis. He pointed out that under previous administrations also there had been endemic disease, old age and death.

He claimed that a billion people would turn out for the marches on February 29. “This is an issue that cuts across partisan lines,” he said.

A conservative source agreed. “We’re going to make the Garden of Eden great again. If we can’t control our mortality, our wellness, and our age, what is the use in controlling our borders?”

Some expressed skepticism, however. “This has been going on for a long time,” said Jayprakash Mahato, a pan vendor in Calcutta. “We should have acted immediately after evolving from Homo erectus. Solving the problem now will require huge sacrifices, and I just don’t see the necessary political will in our current generation of leaders.”

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© 2017

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